I signed up for BSF this year without really knowing how I was going to pull it off, because I have a daily deadline of 12:30 pm (for iVillage). These first weeks, I've been rushing out of there ASAP and hurrying home to get my work done. Also: one day I hung back in the classroom after everyone else went to lecture, and basically hid in there doing my iVillage work, until I was allowed to sign out the lesson for the following week.
My plan was to make it work, through hiding out to get work done, or signing out lessons ahead of time, or rushing home early.
Yesterday, out of the blue, my editor changed my work schedule between now and Christmas. It doubles up my Monday work, and more or less CLEARS my Tuesday mornings.
I realized that I haven't seen a God coincidence like this in a long time. When they have happened, it's often been related to BSF. I thought back on all the ways the BSF has shaped major directions in my life. I met Lee through friends I met at BSF. I found our church in NJ through someone at BSF. I found Laurie, my Christian (and only) connection in Georgia, through BSF, and through Laurie I found my mentoring group with Martha and though it, my current church.
But back to this latest God coincidence. In my BSF class, we talked about Rahab, the prostitute who helped Joshua's men in Jericho. Rahab was a woman who acted. She got things done, and not always in the "Christian" way. She heard that Joshua's God had parted the Red Sea to deliver his people, and that those very people were not bent on conquering Jericho. She had a decision to make: Who's side would she take? Would she put her faith in the strong-walled Jericho, or would she put her faith in the God who she'd heard had parted the Red Sea?
She took a calculated risk, and chose the latter. Then she lied to and deceived her own authorities in order to protect Joshua. And God blessed her.
I'm like her. I didn't pray that God would ease the way for me to do BSF. I schemed and made it work. I wanted to be in BSF, even though I'd forgotten what it's like to experience God coincidences. All I remembered was that BSF is good. And then God cleared the way.
I'm an imperfect Christian, and I ought to strive to be better. But I can rest in the fact that I am, in fact, a child of God no matter what. And he's here and willing to interact with me.
In the notes this week, BSF asks the question: Will you thank God in advance for how he will care for you through your present difficulties?
My present difficulties are that I'm frustrated with Lee's reckless spending (we're still carrying $6000 in credit card debt and yet he bought himself nearly $1600 worth of electronics for his birthday). And I'm frustrated that when I went to Bible study on Monday night, I was the only one who shared honestly, and the big crowd just sort of blinked at me. TMI, apparently. Embarrassing.
However: God is here and involved. Thank you, Lord, for how you will care for me through these circumstances. Change my heart for Lee. No more resentment, just love and support. I pray that someone would come into Lee's life to say the things I want to say. I pray that you would change me, give me peace and gratitude for him and for my life and all your blessings.
In light of you, what are money problems? Nothing.
In your son's name I pray.
Amen
