The Day Ahead

My day ahead...

One post
Pick up Trixie at groomer
Isabel play date/homework/piano practice
Dinner?
Swim parent meeting
Lee

Ephesians 5: 11-16

^11-16 Don’t waste your time on useless work, mere busywork, the barren pursuits of darkness. Expose these things for the sham they are. It’s a scandal when people waste their lives on things they must do in the darkness where no one will see. Rip the cover off those frauds and see how attractive they look in the light of Christ. Wake up from your sleep, Climb out of your coffins; Christ will show you the light!

Yesterday I wrote a blog post on Lindsay Lohan's cocaine use. Useless work, mere busywork. On Tuesday I learned that my editor's budget has been cut. Now she'll be assigning me two posts on Weds and Fridays instead of three. I was slightly upset. Money, money, money. But in light of this passage, it seems to be for the best. I need to begin to use my skills on something beyond busy work.

Lord, show me what that is!!!!

My day ahead

My day ahead...

Two posts
Bagel store, grocery store
Take Isabel to first day of swim
Library
Bring home Isabel and Hannah F
Prepare dinner
Lee

God's word...

Colossians 3:1-2

The Message (MSG)

He Is Your Life

Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don’t shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ—that’s where the action is. See things from his perspective.

How can I apply this to...

Two posts

Bagel store, grocery store

Take Isabel to first day of swim

Library

Bring home Isabel and Hannah F

Prepare dinner

Lee

Delighting in weakness

Today the Beth Moore bible study brought me to 2 Corinthians 9-10. Paul has just acknowledged the thorn in his side--which he's asked God to remove.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Delighting in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in difficulties! What difficulties am I facing, what difficulties can I delight in? Not being in control of Lee's next career move and how it will impact me and the girls. I delight in the idea that I must pray, PRAY, to you Lord. I will take the news as it comes, stay in the moment, concentrate on loving you and others in your name.

I need to decide whether or not to write a letter for Isabel to get Mrs. Lupiani again, this time for third grade. This is minor, and yet important, too. What's most important is for me to realize my weakness in this situation. I can't predict which teacher would be best for Isabel, and I can only make a decision based on what I know now--which is that Isabel loves and respects Mrs. Lupiani.

I would like to start up a devotion with the girls again. Why did I let it fall to the wayside? Because I felt I wasn't doing justice to the material, that I hadn't prepared well enough. I will delight in my weakness! I will forge ahead anyway, let you teach them through my limited abilities. I will show up and try my best, knowing that you can work through my weakness.

Tonight we'll have dinner with Mom and Dad and Jay and Ann. I pray for a spirit of warmth, and for Lee to feel comfortable to talk about his work situation, and for the exchange of advice. I pray that I will show love and patience.

We would like for Isabel to take piano lessons. Lily, too. But we don't have the money for a piano (let alone the lessons) right now. I pray in my weakness, Lord, that you will make this happen, if it's your will. And if it's not, that's OK too!

I pray for Mom and Dad, that you would protect them and guard their health. I pray for Isabel and Lily, that you would go before them and stand behind them wherever they go. I pray for Lee, for strength and confidence as he seeks another job.

I thank you! Show me what you have for me next...

In Your son's name I pray,

Amen

Surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus

My Beth Moore bible study brought me to this passage today:

But whatever was to my profit I now consider great loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ--the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith.


For several months now, there have been changes afoot at Lee's office. Lee's only heard whispers of them; I've been more or less completely in the dark. As of next week, most everyone around him will be moving on, to other companies. Lee hears that he'll be offered a choice: relocate to New York or accept a severance package. He has an interview with another company on Monday.

As I face a time of uncertainty--Lee is not just my husband and best friend but also my money train, after all--I consider the possibility of loss, and of pressure to contribute. I have been riding along on cruise control, not forced to act and so...not acting.

Lord, you seem so far away, and I struggle even to believe you exist at all. But I want to not get hung up on that. I want to put my doubts aside and just step out in faith. I want to consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. Am I willing to lose all things (our house? my free time? spending money for the kids' activities?) that I may gain Christ and be found in him? And WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE--GAINING CHRIST?

Lord, I want to pray for Lee, but I don't know how. So I just ask you, to please be present and guide him. He is stressed, as usual. You offer peace. Is there a plan already in place? "I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Does this apply to us, here, now?

Writing you these emails isn't supposed to be a one-way conversation, but of course you don't write back. You have given us your Word, though. I'll look at it again.

Whatever was to my profit I now consider great loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ.  Not having a righteousness of my own--but that which is through faith in Christ. If you do have a plan for me, and you urge me to have faith in you, then I need to look for what you already have for me to do. Not having a righteousness of my own, but through faith.

Please show me what you would have me do next.

In Your Son's name I pray.
Amen

Prayer for 2/13/13

Lord,
I'm tired of exalting my problems over you. You alone are my rock and my salvation. My soul finds rest in God alone.

Lee is depressed and anxious, overeating, over drinking, prone to sickness, and he's recalcitrant about Mom and Dad. But you are the King of Glory, the Lord Almighty, the maker of Heaven and Earth! In all things you work for the good of those who love you. I pray that in my situation today, you will work.

I want to go to California with the girls, but the plane tickets are $512. I would love for Lee to go, too. He doesn't want to, and he doesn't want me to go, either. Lord, step in please and soothe things, work this out! I want to see Sara, I want to spend time as a family out there.

I want to be a blessing to my husband, and to be a blessing to my family, too. Lord, you have inestimable power. I want to hand my problems to you! Those who seek the Lord lack no good thing!

Prayers

How does God see me right now? 

How do You see my activities and plans and thoughts? You see the children's Christmas pageant at Eastminster as an expression of love. You want me to trust You, as always. To pray for the pageant (I pray, Lord!) and to see it as something You've ushered me into, and which You will lead me through step by step. You want me to see that it's larger than me, that everything's larger than me, but that You are with me always.

You want me to come to You with my frustrations. Isabel and Lily are contentious these days. These days of all days, right before Christmas! I pray for both of them, for kind hearts, for kind thoughts, for the realization that they are each other's best friend. I pray for guidance on how to lead them to walk in Your path.

I pray that in everything I do, I can be of use to You. That I wouldn't forget. 

I pray for the families of the children massacred in Newtown, Connecticut. I pray that I would believe in You anew.

In Your son's name I pray.

Amen

From My Utmost for His Highest...

The apostle Paul had a strong and steady underlying consistency in his life. Consequently, he could let his external life change without internal distress because he was rooted and grounded in God. Most of us are not consistent spiritually, because we are more concerned with being consistent externally.

"God forbid that I should boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ," he wrote in Galatians 6:14.

I didn't get up this morning and think about who I am, really. Which is to say, God's child, someone He's working on, someone He intends to use for His perfect, lovely purposes. I got Isabel and Lily off to school (lunches, smoothies, shoes, hairbrush...). I walked the dog, ate breakfast, read a book review in The New York Times, cleaned up, said goodbye to Lee (cranky as always, pre-coffee). 

Actually, prior to all that I woke up super early--say, 4 am--from a toothache that's still bothering me since my dentist appointment two weeks ago. That means he might have hit a nerve, which means back again, more money and time spent in pain and discomfort. So I took yet another Advil and pushed the thought aside.

Let's go back and practice gratitude. I am grateful for teeth. I am grateful for having the money and time to get them fixed when they are aching. I am grateful for Advil, and grateful that, who knows, this pain might subside on its own if I give it another week.

I think of this pain as an opportunity to be the person I long to be, someone who doesn't grumble and complain about small things, and who trusts. Someone whose first inclination is to pray for healing. Lord, I pray that You would heal my aching tooth. There. I've prayed. Now I will wait and see.

Today I have work to do: an iVillage post, as usual, and also a gallery about Dancing With the Stars. I also have to see if I can find some neighbors to help with set-up on Saturday before the neighborhood Christmas brunch. I want to serve joyfully. With Your help, Lord, I'll serve joyfully. What a great opportunity to show love to others! And with no expectation for love in return. 

I need to start shopping for Christmas gifts. I need to review the Christmas pageant script. I need to buy party supplies for Saturday, and groceries for dinner and general needs. Can I do all of this with a spirit of love and joy? Lord, I pray for Your strength today, that I'll have a sense of Your presence.

In Your son's name I pray,
Amen