The Lord accepts my prayer.

From Psalm 6...

O Lord do not rebuke me in your anger
or discipline me in your wrath.
Be merciful to me, Lord, for I am faint;
O Lord, heal me, for my bones are in agony.
My soul is in anguish.
How long, O Lord, how long?

The Lord has heard my cry for mercy,
the Lord accepts my prayer.

There's a rushing river around me, moving everyone and everything forward. I feel like I'm just trying to keep up. School began yesterday. Isabel and Lily, sweet, sweet, sweet, off together on the school bus. And me back to an empty house.

I want to use my time wisely. I want to be inspired, and to write something worthwhile. For months now I've wondered, What next? I still don't know. Two years ago, I spent the year praying for an opportunity to write a book that glorifies You. I put a deadline on the request. (I felt moved to do it.) Nothing happened.

My desires: To get that rush of fulfillment when I'm enjoying the writing process. To earn money. To prove myself, to prove that all that work towards becoming a writing professional wasn't for naught. To prove that I'm more than just a stay-at-home mom with a part-time TV writing gig.

Lord, You are supposed to be at the center of my life. What does that mean, how does that affect what I do with my precious time alone? Am I seeking the wrong things? Of course my motivation is corrupted by my sinful nature. So are my desires. But I must do SOMETHING. I'm going to try to listen for You. To notice opportunities around me. I am doubtful that You exist, but that doesn't mean You don't exist. I don't trust my sense of when You are nudging or guiding. I've been dead wrong so many times. NONETHELESS, I am going to try to listen for You again.

Requests: Isabel behaved atrociously yesterday. I have given her too much rope, and now I feel I need to pull her in. I want her to obey me with a "Yes, Ma'am" when I ask her to do things.

Some of the things she loves: treats in her lunchbox, playdates with Hannah, playing on the iPad/Dad's iPhone/my computer, LPS. She needs to earn these things through good behavior. That means saying "Yes, Ma'am," and doing it whenever I ask her to do something.

The first time she disobeys, she will lose a lunchbox treat the next day. The second time, she will lose a lunchbox treat for two days in a row. The third time, she will start having to hand over LPS animals (five at a time). The fourth time, she will lose playdate privileges with Hannah.

I pray that You will oversee this system as I try to implement it. I pray that she will begin to obey right away. I also pray that I will be a reasonable parent who chooses her battles and doesn't tyrannize my children.

I pray for Lee, who must be disappointed about not getting a call back for the CNN job. He's also stressed at work. I pray for his health, his diet, his confidence, and that he would know how much I love him.

In Your son's name I pray,
Amen