Willing myself to believe

So I read this article in the New York Times, and I think that the author more or less got it right. 

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/29/books/review/when-god-talks-back-by-tm-luhrmann.html?pagewanted=all

"Evangelical churches brainwash believers. They change the way their members’ brains work. But T. M. Luhrmann, a psychological anthropologist at Stanford, argues that this is not as insidious as it sounds. On the contrary, mental conditioning has a noble lineage in the history of religion, and even (or especially) in this modern age, it can help humans flourish."

She's a little more blunt about it than I would have been, but I do think our overall goal is to condition our minds to be able to "hear" God. It's one of those secular-minded articles that casts Christians as a little deluded, and the idea of psychologically training yourself to believe is downright cold. And yet I do think she got the crux of it right. I DO have to train myself to believe.

Lord, I'm writing to you now. I want to train myself to hear you. I must choose to believe: do I find this to be a noble endeavor with value that has been discovered by many people throughout the ages? I do.

Today's passage from Sacred Space: 

Philip said to him, ‘Lord, show us the Father, and we will be satisfied.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Have I been with you all this time, Philip, and you still do not know me? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, “Show us the Father”? Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on my own; but the Father who dwells in me does his works. Believe me that I am in the Father and the Father is in me; but if you do not, then believe me because of the works themselves. Very truly, I tell you, the one who believes in me will also do the works that I do and, in fact, will do greater works than these, because I am going to the Father. I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If in my name you ask me for anything, I will do it.

The idea of spiritual conditioning, like exercising muscles, is a good one, but it doesn't mention the blessed result: supernatural communication and feeling. I can exercise all I want, and I can become "good" at believing, but God is the one who is reaching out to me. If I am wanting to do exercises to hear him, it's because he is drawing me in. 

I pray that you would help me in my restlessness. I have much to do, and the sands of the hourglass keep dropping! I pray for Lee today, as he boards a plane for Massachusetts. I pray for him that he will take care of himself. I pray that you would show me the way to go today.

In your son's precious name I pray,

Amen