The one thing I ask of the Lord

The one thing I ask of the Lord, the thing I seek after, is to dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon His beauty, and to inquire in His temple.  --Psalm 27:4


I've been faithful about my morning quiet times for three weeks now, and I've already seen a difference in my thinking. I'm more hopeful. I'm not "walking with the Lord," as they say. But I'm hungry for more.

I want Him to grant me my prayer request--that Sara would have an experience with Jesus by Feb. 5--so that I can have something to hang my hat on, spiritually. So clearly, I'm not in a mature spiritual place yet! This morning I realized that I'd promised to pray for this every day, and then yesterday I didn't. Did I jinx it? Did I slip up, drop my end of the bargain, so now all bets are off?

This reminds me of the outdoor movie my family watched on Friday: "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown." Linus believes in the Great Pumpkin, who comes once a year to the most sincere pumpkin patch--the one with no hypocrisy--and gives toys to the children there. All you have to do is believe, but you have to believe sincerely. Your faith itself becomes your way of earning blessing. It must be sincere. At one point, Linus is talking (praying?) to the Great Pumpkin, and he says "if" you come to the pumpkin patch. Then he quickly corrects himself. "I mean 'when'!" Then Linus worries. "Oh no! One slip up like that could ruin the whole thing!"

The joke is that Linus is putting himself through all this existential angst, while all the other kids know that the Great Pumpkin doesn't exist.

How do I know that this isn't the case with the Lord, my God? That my God does exist? There is Scripture, 66 books that hold together despite being written across hundreds of years. There are generations of human beings, millions of people, who have believed. But more than that, there's the change within me, when I spend time reading and meditating and learning.

Christians love to say that God meets you where you are. There are lots of examples of it in the Bible. All of the people He's communicated with have been flawed. My prayer--that Sara would have an experience with Jesus by February 5--is flawed. There's an element of magical thinking to it. I'm not that different from Linus. But I'm praying it anyway, and I'm not going to worry about my motives or my immaturity. God knows them. Linus was praying to a pumpkin. I'm praying to the Creator of the universe.

Lord, I pray that Sara will have an experience with Jesus by February 5. I also pray that you will show me an opportunity to write a book that glorifies You by September 2011. I pray expectantly. I pray also that You will lead me in the direction You want me to go in regarding Mt Bethel's foster kids program. I am trying to be open.


I pray for Lee. You know what He needs better than I do. From my perspective, I wish he had a mentor/men's group/spiritual friendship to help him. But You know better than I do, so I simply pray that You will infuse his life with Your love.


I pray for my precious children. Please protect them, nurture and comfort them. Amen