Worry

I continue to worry about what to do with Lily's schooling. I have given the decision to God, and I keep taking it back. I had nearly made up my mind to hold her back after talking to a mother of a child in Lily's class who did it. But then I spoke to two other mothers (who aren't in this predicament) who didn't see the need to hold her. And the para pro in Isabel's classroom said that if Lily was ready academically, I shouldn't hold her. And of course there's the money--it will cost $3000 to keep her in pre K another year. But what really bothers me is the fact that I would be defying the standard age cut-off, imposing my own ideas about when Lily should start school. Who am I to do that?

Today the BSF homework sent me to Genesis 11:1-9, the story of the prideful and self-sufficient people of Babel. They built a tower to the heavens "so that we may make a name for ourselves." The BSF question: What type of attitude does Babylon signify? When and where in yourself do you have to look out for this type of attitude?

When I try to be self-sufficient, I end up frustrated and worried. Lord, please make this decision about Lily's schooling for me. I will try to stop thinking about it, but simply look for Your wisdom in this. Put the right answer in my head, and then please give me peace about it.


I pray for Lee, and for our relationship. He meets with the financial advisor tomorrow. I pray for Your help through this advisor. I pray for our Date Night on Saturday. Maybe through the homework questions I could get to the bottom of what I need to change. Mostly, I need You to change my heart towards him. I get so disappointed in the impassive way he often treats me that I lose sight of You and the fact that I'm ministering to him. 


I pray that Sara will have an experience with Jesus by February 5, and that You will show me an opportunity to write a book that glorifies You by September 2011. Amen